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I can stand up straight!!

This morning I meditated on the goodness of my Lord. This time last week I could not stand up straight. I was walking around bent over. We figure it was my attempt to put the washing on the line first thing in the morning that did it. A basket of wet laundry is quite heavy after all, for me at least. That is why I once went into an awful strop at Toddlers when there were effectively just two people putting out all the toys and equipment. I could not stand back and not help, but I knew that if I did I would have massive problems the following day. For months we could not understand why I found it so painful to get out of bed on Saturday mornings. We decided that it was the lifting and bending over, etc, on Friday Toddlers that did it. Any way, so I was at CenterParcs, OK with cycling bent over, but walking rather awkwardly. We brought our microwave wheatbag/hot water bottle. It was there on my back pretty much the whole day. Then I slept on it. Tuesday morning I had this fear: what if I

She's only two (Part 2)

This blog post refers: Last Toddlers session this morning for this school year. My son came along to help with the 'money-changing'. He's very good at this. I was wondering if Mum-without-a-clue ("G") would turn up. Childminder ("J") was there and said, "O dear! Maybe she won't come again. But her girl needs to keep coming here." Mum with blonde hair (let's call her "B") arrived. She told me that we have better watch out for "that little girl" ("M"). She could see her, she said. "Where?" I asked. My responsibility was to check in parents and toddlers and any visitors. I need to account for every person who is in the building for health and safety reasons. In the event of a fire I am to blow the whistle, lead the folk to safety. Most importantly I must grab all the attendance cards with me so that I could account for everyone. I hadn't seen M. "There she is in that blue dress." "

Fourth of July

Hectic morning at Toddlers on Friday. Difficult mum did not show up so we could not put into action what was planned for her. Back home I realized that in the hurly-burly of the week I had completely forgotten to buy HIM a birthday card for HIS 50th. So having sorted out what I needed to sort out I hurried along to the shops thinking that I would just have time to buy the card and head back to school for the Leavers Service . I rummaged for my purse as I entered the first card shop I came to and searched, and searched, and searched, and realized that I had forgotten to bring my purse in my distracted state of mind (having to switch TV on for mum-in-law for her to watch Wimbledon, eg). There wasn't time for me to get home. I rummaged again and thankfully found some loose change I had thrown into the bag, and two plastic coins from my son's toy cash register. In the end I was delighted to find a 'husband 50th' (not '50th husband, note !) card that I could afford. Yay!

She's only two. She does not understand. Wrong!

Funny sort of morning yesterday. At the end of what appeared to be a fairly calm toddlers session, a childminder came up to me to say "Did you know you have a very naughty girl here?" It turned out that this little girl has been pinching cheeks, slapping faces and pulling hair, etc. Usually these incidents get reported to us fairly quickly so I was surprised that it had not come to our notice till then. And then, apparently, in a matter of ten seconds after this report, this little girl had traumatized another three kids. The mother? I had always thought this mother rather strange. Sometimes she sticks around for nearly 20-30 minutes after our closing*. All of us here are volunteers. We have other business and family to take care of. We rather like being able to clean up after a session and head home. Soon I had two or three mothers telling me how the little girl had misbehaved. Well, we expect two-year-olds to go through a certain phase, don't we? But what came across to

Me: laziest housewife I know (Part 2)

Son's school sports day today. We had the best weather and son was amazingly positive today. Two mothers came up to congratulate me on his achievement in gaining the Chief Scout's Silver Award (mentioned by the Headmaster in the school bulletin last week). Somehow we got round to talking about my making him tidy up from a very young age. This is really the 'luxury' of a stay-at-home mother. (One mum expressed how because she always had an au pair , her son never had a chance to do this.) I had the choice of tidying up for him and get it over and done with in two minutes, or making my son learn how to do it, even if it took 20 minutes. I opted for the latter. When life got a bit messy I used to say, "Let's see if you could put five toys back in the box." He would then count five toys into the box. "OK, I think we need to put another seven in." Sometimes it was nine, ten, or whatever number of toys. Sometimes it was five green colour toys (eg five

Kinsella Murder: Boys need male role models

The relevant link from the Telegraph : Ben Kinsella murder: why gang members choose loyalty to each other over family Allow me to highlight a few extracts. The emphases are mine: ''Members are usually from dysfunctional families and broken homes,'' he says. They are failures at school who end up playing truant at an early age and joining groups. From around 11 they join gangs and these become alternative families. But they are ruled by brutal discipline that spills over into extreme violence.'' ''The majority, like Michael Alleyne, come from wildly fractured families - often they are the offspring of single mothers - for whom the gang becomes a surrogate family,'' believes Peter Andrews, author of ''Britain's Gang Culture.'' Often membership, he explains, grants status. ''But it's more than that. It offers an extended family with all the fierce, loyal protection that exists within blood families - something few

Migrants lost in Translation

I was not at all surprised to read this article: Councils spend £50m a year translating documents no-one reads Just look a this: "Haringey translated into Albanian, Kurdish and Somali a leaflet for recommending council staff for internal awards. Only 12 people ever viewed the documents." It reads as though this leaflet is for council staff. If council staff cannot read English, then surely they should not be employed by the council at all. What an utter waste of money! Whilst people might speak a language, it does not always mean that they are able to read the language just as well. Also, the councils assume that people have free access to computers and internet. As this is not the case, the headline here is also misleading (let's call a spade a spade). While I am not terribly fond of Ms Hazel Blears her advice to councils to "think twice before translating documents" makes sense. This is a version of my letter sent to Times (the newspaper) and published on 13t

Me: laziest housewife I know (Part 1)

Don't like the term 'housewife'. Married to a man, not a house, so why 'housewife'? In Singapore the preferred term was 'homemaker' for a while. But all the potential homemakers migrated to the corporations and the home had to be made (maid?) by FDWs (Foreign Domestic Workers). In 2004 I undertook research on 'stay-at-home mothers' or SAHMs in Singapore (thanks to a grant from the British Academy). The results of this research have yet to be published in a peer-reviewed journal ... because I am still a SAHM. This term has gained popularity in Singapore (since then? maybe it wasn't anything to do with me, who knows?). An interesting finding was most of these SAHMs did not do much 'housework'. They stayed at home, but they still had FDWs to cook and clean for them. So while they might do the food shopping (called 'marketing' in the 'wet markets'), SAHMs often only supervised others in homemaking. The whole objective of being

When did you last disinfect your tissue paper?

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Since the start of this 'swine flu' scare, there has been an increase in the government-sponsored advertising with the slogan 'Catch it. Bin it. Kill it'. Well, it has certainly killed much of my hankie business which is usually in full flow this time of year, it being hayfever season. And you know what is even more exasperating? They are using MY tax money to bring you this advertising, effectively ruining my business. This admonition to 'bin it' suggests that disposable tissue paper is more hygienic than cloth hankies. One school website says explicitly that cloth hankies are to be avoided. But when was the last time you disinfected a piece of tissue paper? So, being the researcher that I am I took a closer look at my internet search results for 'swine flu and hankie'. Here are some of my conclusions: (1) The habit of covering one's mouth with a hankie or tissue when one sneezes or coughs is no longer a habit amongst some of the younger people in

"for family reasons"

OK, this awful MPs' expenses scandal is really quite cathartic. Today another two female MPs said they are stepping down in order to "spend more time with their families". These are MPs/Ministers in their late 50s/60s. Their children are not nine years old, like my son. What I found particularly galling is Patricia Hewitt saying: "I did initially want to serve another term. But I feel the time is right," said Ms Hewitt. "The truth is that after 13 years as an MP and ten years in Government, I have not seen enough of my family. They have paid a high price for that." THE TRUTH IS thenext election (if she's voted back in, no guarantee of that) will take her to past the 15 years in Parliament which qualifies her for a much more generous pension. She would now have to forgo that. O, poor thing! As for not seeing enough of the family, isn't it a bit late to spend time with family and children who have left home, or are leaving soon? My husband is als

Appointment to see the neurologist

Yay! I've been given an appointment to see someone at the neurology department some time in July. My GP ran all the tests and found nothing wrong with me, but I am still getting the numbness in both my hands (usually when I sleep) and we both want to know that it is not the onset of some degenerative nerve disease. They now have this 'choose and book' system. One is given a long list of hospitals we could go to (previously one could go to the one decided by the GP, I suppose). We then check them out online, see how long their waiting list is, and try to book an appointment. The hospital I chose did not have an online booking system, so I had to ring up. The hospital had not issued any dates. So it could be two months or twice that. Who knows? I was told that if the hospital does not contact me within two weeks, then I must go back to the GP for advice. What? Go back to the GP? Do you know how difficult it is to get an appointment to see my GP? So I put it down in my diary t

Domestic Goddess -- not!

One of the mums from my toddler group came in some time with a box full of popular magazines she rescued from the bin at her office. There was quite a scramble as mums tried to pick a magazine either for themselves or for their children. I got myself one on home decor. Me, home decor? Ha! Before we got married I made it quite clear to my husband-to-be I am not the proud house-owner type (ie: don't expect me to keep the house spotless, etc, etc.) Thankfully he was of the view that it is no fun living in a showroom. We can boast of living in a very 'lived in' house. Toys everywhere? That's only because my son had not tidied up. I do not go tidying up after him. Anyway, I spotted this section on covering up an 'open cupboard' (ie open shelves) with a patchwork curtain: "Sew together fabrics until you have a piece one and a half times the length of your worktop. Stitch a narrow casing at the top and hem the bottom. Thread curtain wire through the casing and fix

Cannabis factory #2

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Looks like the police refused to tell even the owner of the house about the case. He was around earlier and I went over to share my commiserations. He told me he rented it out to a Chinese family who never paid the rent, so he came down with the police to see what happened. Apparently there was some guy upstairs. "Any arrests?" The police wouldn't say. Hmm. Today he engaged a couple of guys to empty the pots of compost into a truck. The piles of plastic pots are shown below. How many pots did they find? Note there are more pots behind the green wheelie bins. Back to Organic-Ally . Become our fan on Facebook .

A cannabis factory across from my house

Tuesday we noticed police presence across the road. After son's piano concert I walked across to police officer and asked if there's been a break-in. If there's one, I needed to know. "Nothing to worry about, madam. Not a break-in." No dead bodies? "Nothing like that madam." Wednesday I could see policeman guarding the open door as colleague was doing something inside. Dusting for fingerprints? Poor chap standing there all morning in the cold. So at lunch time I went over to say, "Would you like a cup of tea?" I don't think he's allowed to accept hospitality while on duty. I mean, what if I spiked his drink? No, he said. What about your colleagues? "I'm fine," came the voice of his female colleague from inside the house. I could see that the house was in a bit of a mess. Thursday. Another policeman at door while his colleague was inside. Then she was outside, writing up some report on the big wheelie bin. Today (Friday), b

It's good to talk ... listen

On Tuesday I heard a BBC programme in the afternoon (hands on the sewing machine, ears to the radio, that's multi-tasking?) which made me feel completely vindicated about not letting my son watch TV for the first two years of his life. Well, not all TV, but children's TV. He was allowed to watch sport and news. The psychologist (Arik Sigmund) on the programme confirmed my hunch that children's TV is bad for the developing baby/toddler brain. According to scientific studies children who watched 'educational DVDs' were not any better in their comprehension and vocabulary when compared to those who watched The Simpsons and Oprah Winfrey. The only group with superior ability were "those who watched none of those but simply incidentally hear background conversation of their parents with others". He concluded that listening which forces us to 'paint pictures in our mind' is better at fostering cognitive development. Well, there! I remember feeding my bab

Baby #2 (!!)

My son is nine (NINE!) today. I also took another plunge and started another 'shop' on Etsy where I hope to interest a non-UK market in my embroidered stuff. I am really getting excited about this crafty/creative business. As I noted in my Etsy page, most of the fun is in the digitizing process.

This swine fever business

It's a bit like the British troops in Singapore pointing their guns in a southerly direction and the Japanese troops attacked from their north, via Johore, on their push-bikes. I was talking about the bird flu a lot and now we hear the pandemic is of swine flu. My husband is permanently on immuno-suppressant and you can understand some of the anxiety in our household. He also goes to work on the Tube every day. He is very vulnerable. The authorities have been promoting the use of tissue paper, something about binning it after we've blown our nose. My instinctive feel (rightly or wrongly) is used tissue paper left in open bins are just as great a health risk. Of course I have vested interests. I want people to buy my lovely organic cotton hankies (now with embroidery!!). The thing is if one is not mindful of one's hygiene, paper tissues and hankies are equally bad. At least, one's cloth hankies are usually isolated in one's pockets. I remember my first impression of

Table for one?

In a few minutes I take my son back to school -- at last, yay! On Tuesday we went to his favourite little cafe as a treat. This is a department store cafe. We arrived just after 11am and we could not find a seat. At last an older lady vacated her table. I took her tray back to the used trays trolley and we sat down to have our early lunch. I looked around and was surprised to find so many people eating on their own, at tables intended for parties of four. Were they being selfish by taking up so much room? Why not opt for a table for two? We were resigned to having to share a table had our lady not get up just at that point. Then it dawned on me that perhaps these people sitting on their own were hoping that others might join them at their tables. Maybe yes, maybe no, as my son would say. But when you are old and live on your own, a bit of conversation with a stranger in a 'safe' neutral place like the department store cafe is not a bad idea. I remember from when I used to volun

Big Agriculture takes umbrage at Mrs Obama's organic garden

What a surprise to read this! Not. Big Agriculture takes umbrage at Mrs Obama's organic garden Back to Organic-Ally . Become our fan on Facebook .

Here comes the Potters

We have not changed our family name, but 'potter' is a good alternative. We spent the Easter Term break doing what potters do, pottering, or should that be what potterers do, in which case the headline should read "Here comes the Potterers". We've never had the guts to get away at Easter. Husband had been a regular at A&E for three or four Easter weekends in a row. Last year we managed to stay away. This year we kept clear. Thank God! But husband did manage to get away for two whole weeks from work (yay!) and we pottered. Caught up with son's godmother. Pottered. Had son's mate over for a sleepover. Pottered. Took them to the Imperial War Museum. Pottered. Went to Kew Gardens. Pottered. Went to Stratford on Avon. Pottered. Now we're back! But life won't return to 'normal' till Thursday when son returns to school. Point is: there is so much to do in this great big country. So sometimes a bit miffed by the working parents at school who co