Posts

Learning to Labour

Some of you might recognize that this is the title of a 'classic' by Paul Willis. It tells how working class boys learn to become working class and take on working class jobs. We recently had a downstairs toilet refitted to make it easier for our aged visitors. It was put in single-handedly by a young man of 30 (30 is young to me now!) who originally came from Bosnia. Us here in the UK are very familiar with the tea-drinking antics of workmen. A point not lost on the author of the The Yellow Tractor , for example. But I was quite taken aback by how hard this young man worked. He was always on time. He never asked for tea or coffee unless I offered. I didn't even see him taking lunch (although I'd seen him drinking Red Bull twice). He cleaned up every day after he had finished. He was meticulous. If something didn't go as planned (like finding a loose floorboard) he would check with me, suggested solutions, waited for approval and then acted on it. He did not even tu

Don't mix Singlish with identity

Recently I sent this letter to the Straits Times : To be or to be – what is the question hah? “Should Singaporeans speak a standard English or Singlish?” is the wrong question. We need to “ go stun ” (back up a little) to ask whether Singaporeans need, or wish, to speak and write a language – any language – fluently enough to hold a sustained, logical and sometimes protracted discussion. Then only do we know how/which to choose. Many have observed that code-switching within a sentence (English, Mandarin, Singlish) is a common phenomenon in Singapore. My Sociology professor reasoned, “But you can’t translate the concept ‘ pek-chek ’, can you?” No, I can’t. I cannot even spell it. This difficulty in writing down the language is an intrinsic part of the problem. We borrow words like “ anomie ” and “ Weltanschauung ” in Sociology because there are no accurate English equivalents. Similarly, when discussing localisms the use of a Singlish term may be appropriate. However a lot of conversati

The Story of Tommy the Cat

This is a brag post. My son gave me permission to post his poem written some time in the last academic year. The teacher had gone over the structure of a poem and the pupils were asked to write another based on that structure. He wrote the first three stanzas in class and I saw him sitting at our dining table hacking out the last. As usual he refused to let me read any of his homework before submitting. ========== The Story of Tommy the Cat The milkman was driving in his multicoloured truck, When something jumped in front of him – a cat covered in muck! The milkman swerved, the milk truck tipped, and threw him out the door. The milk was flying everywhere and all across the floor. The cat now grabbed a milk can, and knocked the man half dead. Then dragged him to a building, and left him in a bed. He grabbed the milk, then ran away, and gave himself a drink. For the cat’s name was Tommy, and he needed milk to think. The milkman woke up in his bed, and thought it was all a dream, But Tomm

Would you wear a shirt like this?

Image
Bought shirts for son at the Singapore Zoo. The sleeves and bottom hem of one ended up looking like this after first wash: Now the zoo shop people tell me it IS supposed to look like this. Here are the pictures they sent me to show what a new t-shirt SHOULD look like: Except that I don't remember it looking like this on the display. And it did not look ripped on the day that son wore it. Basically I wouldn't have bought the shirt if I knew it was supposed to look "ripped". Would you spend S$40 on a shirt that is ripped like that after first wash? I think it is a rip-off.

People on benefits should pick fruit and veg

Do you agree? Original report here . Yesterday as the IFS report tells us that the "poor" are worse affected than the "rich" given the new financial squeezes, our minds turned to the thousands needed to pick fruit and veg. People complain that there are no jobs, yet thousands are recruited -- need to be recruited -- from overseas to fill these posts. I have an East European chap working on my bathroom. He's very conscientious, very thorough, very diligent. And so polite. He didn't even dare put his radio on because I have mine on. Until I went out to do a shop. No wonder this well-known local firm of bathroom specialists employ him.

Sony Singapore O dear!

We are all set to check out of the YMCA hostel here which has been our home for the past two weeks. Husband, however, has to trek over to Funan to get a battery for his new camera replaced. That is after we made the futile trek to Wisma Atria as instructed by the Funan salesman to claim our special wide angle lens at an incredible SGD99. Sony is promoting this camera and enticing customers with a promotional offer, but when we went all the way to their distributor they have none of the lenses in stock. In fact they do not have this particular lens ANYWHERE in Singapore. How then should they be allowed to carry on with this promotion? As husband says, "I see a letter (to the press) coming". We tried leaving feedback at Sony website, but it does not accept complaints from tourists from the UK. (The drop-down menu does not feature either UK or USA, why?) So I phoned and guess what? they are closed because of a "company event" and they won't be available till Monday

People Tree Sale

Image
I don't usually shout about promotions, but: Just received my goody bag from People Tree. It's FANTASTIC VALUE!!!! "Beautiful skirts, hand made tops, perfect summer dresses, cropped cotton trousers, delicate jewellery and stylish accessories – in this mystery Goody Bag you will receive at least FIVE hand made Fair Trade products WORTH AT LEAST £100 for JUST £30." Get your own Goody Bag from People Tree quickly now! (O no! just found out they've run out of stock on these bags. But still lots of other stuff that's good.)

Of mums and mums-in-law

Today one of my letters to the Straits Times in response to recent discussion on filial piety was published. I would have missed reading it if husband had not pointed out a letter on poorly-mannered Singapore doctors. When I read my letter again, I realized that a very important sentence was omitted because it is, clearly, not politically correct to even express such a view in a national newspaper. The full text of my letter is here: When researching elderly Chinese living in sheltered housing in the UK, I was struck by how often daughters-in-law were rendered invisible. They did not feature in family photo albums nor were they talked about, except negatively, which is probably why these older Chinese were living on their own. Why, I wonder, would this generation of women who had suffered the wrath of their own mothers-in-law, treat their daughters-in-law so unkindly? It transpired that before our marriage my husband told his parents in no uncertain terms where I, his wife-to-be, would

Which Child/Mother Benefits?

Image
Millions may lose out in reform of child benefits According to the above report in Times(Online) : "Frank Field, appointed by the coalition last week, is also looking at taxing child benefit and allowing parents to receive payments of up to £25,000 in the first three years after a child’s birth. In an interview with The Times, the former Labour minister said that the benefit, which costs the taxpayer £11 billion a year, should be linked more closely to the child’s age. "Poorer parents are eligible for payments worth up to £100,000 in both child benefit and tax credits by the time a child is 19, according to Mr Field. "He said there was a clear case for providing more money in the early years to help mothers to stay at home after their child was born — a policy also backed by Iain Duncan Smith, the Work and Pensions Secretary." It is great to have a chunk of a child benefit up front to make it easier for mothers (or perhaps fathers as well?) to stay at home to give t

Copyright and Integrity

Last Tuesday some of the boys in son's school showcased their piano skills. This usually means playing some boring exam piece they've spent the last six months practising. Along came one of his mates who did not attend the rehearsal but decided to come on to play ... wait for it ... Star Wars (one of the tunes from). It was a hesitant performance, but never mind. It was brave. Yesterday son came home to say another promising pianist in his class wants now to play the theme from 'ET' at the next concert (we're talking May 2011, OK?). Son asked if it was OK for him to loan friend his John Williams book. "We are not allowed to make a photocopy for him, are we? So I've better let him borrow my book." I felt really proud of my son who thinks about whether it is right to photocopy copyrighted material. I would rather he does not let his friend borrow his book for a whole year, thank you very much. And should his friend choose to photocopy from it, we might n

Self-esteem and Mix(ed)-handedness

Had a most illuminating chat with son last night. He was reading the book Stick Up for Yourself: Every Kid's Guide to Personal Power and Self-Esteem. A gain. Why? I asked. "O well, you know, my self-esteem is at an all-time low." Something to do with being ranked in "C" team at cricket. But you came in top at skiing, I said. "Yeah, but that is all forgotten," (ie by the other boys in class). Then he went into the technicalities on how to bowl a cricket ball and how he was often criticized, and we drifted into talking about his preference to use the right hand for some tasks and the left hand for some tasks. Clearly having a very strong left hand has given him an advantage in piano playing. Obviously, I said, your brains must be a bit confused when it comes to bowling a cricket ball. Ah! That explains why you are so good at skiing, I said. You use both left and right sides of the body equally when skiing. Face on son shows a lightbulb has gone on. Did s

Parenting guru. Moi?

Not yet. But it was good to meet a mother from my toddlers group last Saturday. She was at my son's school "Open Day". She told me she would always remember what I said to her, many moons ago. Apparently she was trying to tell her son -- who was happily chattering away -- to shut up. Apparently I said to her that it is OK to let toddlers chatter away. Apparently I said that "we spend all their first months encouraging them to talk, and then when they start talking we tell them to keep quiet. It must be confusing to the poor child." For whatever reason this young mum remembered this, and my face -- for I don't think she knows my name -- will always be associated with that "advice" I gave her. I didn't think it was the right time and place to mention that we must also teach our children that "there is a time and place for everything", under heaven, if I might add.

Can this be true?

From the Telegraph today: "Meanwhile, more evidence emerged of the painful cuts in public spending which are set to come in across the board whoever wins the election. It was revealed that secret plans have been compiled by NHS bosses which would see thousands of training posts for doctors and nurses axed after the election, despite claims from ministers that front line services would be protected if Labour were re-elected. "Thousands of training posts have been earmarked for closure in cutbacks planned by the government." Who are these 'NHS bosses'? Trim the layers of bureaucracy, not stop training medical staff, I say.

This ostrich-turkey-chicken election

This election has been so lacking in ideology. Max Hastings calls this the "ostrich election" as politicians and voters alike bury their heads in sand and hope that the real problems we face would just go away. It is like a toddler putting his little hands on his eyes and saying, "You can't see me now." Then toddlers grow up and realize, hey, other people can still see them even when they covered their eyes. So, too, we must grow up. None of the major parties seem to have any undergirding ideology in the recent years. There is no real 'vision' for this society. Everywhere there is just a bit of tinkering here, a bit of polyfiller there. Meanwhile the voters want lower taxes, higher benefits, higher pensions, better schools, better health care, better transport, but how do we pay for that? Many taxpayers (of which I'm one, just as women, of which I'm one) do not mind paying taxes to help those most in need. We don't even mind helping those wh

Redundancy as Goal?

The politicians are not telling us about the cuts in public services that will be necessary. That's OK as I will argue that (1) because a lot of public services/offices can indeed be cut and (2) public/civil servants should work towards the goal of redundancy. I have lost count of the number of letters we have received that tell us: you are invited to make an appointment to see your consultant; this is to confirm that we have cancelled your appointment with your consultant; this is to confirm that your new appointment with your consultant is ...; please complete the survey about your experience of seeing the GP*; please be notified that ballot papers for the local election will be sent out soon; please be informed that ballot papers for the General Election will be sent out soon; ad infinitum . Does anyone seriously think that the people sending these letters out actually do make a difference to our illness/well-being or "front-line services"? What would be the effect of

Being a Grandparent

My son (coming up ten years old) once explained to me why being a grandparent is such a wonderful thing. "All that happens is you get a phone call that says, 'Congratulations! You're a grandparent!' with none of that carrying a baby around for nine months." Out of the mouths of babes, eh? He's been away on a school trip and we noticed that he is not keen to make contact on the phone. Conclusion: our son is growing up. That is good. That is very good. (I am the one who must get used to him being away from me. ) Still a part of me thinks he is never going to understand what it feels to be a parent, UNTIL he becomes a parent himself (ie when I get to be a grandparent). However where children are concerned, you know how you keep telling them that childhood is the best time of one's lives when we could live without a care (at least it was when I was growing up). We tell them school days are the best days because we did not have to be burdened with the worries o

Help! Another Prodigy!

I really cannot understand why parents push their prodigies into university. Let me go on field trip or I'll sue, prodigy, 13, tells college Clearly these brains are so advanced they cannot see that learning something/sitting exams/graduating university earlier does not make them any better/more mature/nicer people. So what if my child is able to sit A Level exams at age eight, ten, or twelve? After that, what? My son was able to read anything he set his eyes on at five. So Dad bought him a whole set of Famous Five books. Why not? Both Mum and Dad enjoyed the Famous Five . Son tried reading one and gave up. He did not have the emotions to cope with that kind of adventure. It frightened him. He read the lot more recently and quite enjoyed them. Age nine is so different from age five when you are under a decade old. Thirteen-year-old boys should do what 13-year-old boys do: get zits and gain an interest in girls. Children and only children once. They should not be deprived of their

Grey is the new Green

Do you know someone --anyone -- above the age of 40 who has NEVER coloured her hair? I was researching old people in my mid-30s. It was advantageous to me then to point out that I was already greying and felt much at home with the old people I spent a lot of time with. But they kept telling me I was grey not because I was old (they were in their 70s, 80s and 90s and I was relatively young to them), but that I read too many books. Crunch came when I returned to Singapore to prepare for my wedding. Friends suggested that I might consider colouring my hair, either "just to hide the grey", or sometimes in a more diplomatic way, to give it some 'highlights'. Having seen my mum struggle to keep her hair black when there wasn't that wide array of over-the-counter hair dyes we now have, and having seen how beautiful she looked when she went completely 'silver', I was loath to colour my hair. Some years back one hairdresser had in fact suggested my trying "bur

Black boys are too feminised

In the parent-and-toddler group I help to run we have two fathers from Croatia who bring their daughters. They often chat loudly together during singing time. The lady in charge is afraid to tell them off because it could be viewed as racism. I spoke firmly to these fathers and immediately instead of talking between themselves they sat down with their daughters and did "Row, row, row your boats" etc with them. The young girls were delighted. I can get away with telling these parents most things because I am not-white. So I'm glad that there are people like Mr Sewell who dares tell it as it is: (black) boys need fathers . Check out also earlier post here .

Dangerous Dogs, Owners and Parents

This week the talk has been how to control dangerous "status" dogs owned by young men (usually) who are often simply young people on benefits. They swagger around with their pit bull-like dogs, letting these dogs foul the pavement and often use these dogs to threaten others. Would you, in your right mind, confront one of these if you saw that they were not picking up after their dogs? So our good minister, a certain Mr Johnson, has been talking about making sure that dog owners insure their dogs against their biting innocents. My former band instructor said he came from a school in Singapore called "Holy Innocents". The boys' nickname for their school was "Holy in no sense". Mr Johnson was, in my reckoning, speaking "wholly in no sense". Then there was the news of John Veneables, "one of the Bulger killers", being thrown back into prison. A certain children's "Tsar" (advocate) also said that we are criminalizing our c